What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

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In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Is the Chinese economy currently collapsing? If not, what could potentially cause it to collapse?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Why is pure dopamine not a recreational drug? And if it was wouldn’t it be the most addictive and fairly side effect free?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Make Nazis afraid again!

What is the meanest thing your husband has said to you?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why don't younger men like older women?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

What made you stop being an addict?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Why are Americans obese? Is it the food or is it the psychology?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Why do many Hong Kong Chinese look different from the Han Chinese in mainland China?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Why am I totally different than others? Why do I have a problem with my basic knowledge about society and reality? Why am I dumb and stupid?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Why do atheists always argue about the existence of suffering in the world as meaning God doesn't exist when it doesn't prove anything?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Why are flat Earthers made fun of when they seemingly don't exist? I have only met one flat Earther in 18 years.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

How do I come out as queer to my best friend in a funny and stupid way?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.